So I ended my week of "Silence". I'm not going to say it was an epic failure, but it was not what I would consider a success either.
This was actually the virtue that caught my attention when I first read about them in Reader's Digest a few weeks ago. In fact, I told one of my best friends that this was something we seriously needed to work on. She called me later that afternoon and asked me if I was saying she had a big mouth. I chose to be silent on that matter!!
I don't really think she or I have what you would call a "big mouth". But I have noticed something about myself over the past few years that I don't particularly like. I think I kind of regressed back to high school. You know, where you change the way you act or talk to fit into certain situations. I don't like this trait that I've developed.
Before I give you an example, let me first say that I am truly ashamed that I've let myself do this. I am an adult, and I know better...which is why I started this journey to a better me anyway!!
Ok, here it goes. (Names have been changed to protect privacy) Let's say a group of our friends were over for a barbecue. After all of the small talk about how the meat has been marinated and the potatoes have been cooked someone brings up Susie's weight gain. Rebecca says something like, "Have you seen how fat Susie is now." Gary says, "She used to be so hot. How did she let herself go?" Gina says, "Probably too many Little Debbie snack cakes!" In my attempt to be funny, all I've done is make fun of someone who may have a medical issue causing her to gain weight.
That was a lame example, I know...so I'll throw this one out there...
We live in a small town and we would think the world was coming to an end if there weren't some kind of juicy rumor going around about someone. Rumors are always intriguing, but no one I know wants them going around about themselves! I get sucked into stories about people I don't even know! Number one...why do I care about the love life of someone I don't even know. And two...why would I ever give my two cents on that person if I knew nothing about what is going on in his/her life? I'm ashamed to say I'm guilty of this. In the past I've repeated something I've heard about someone else without knowing if it's true or not. WHY? I guess I'm stupid that way. I don't do it often, but depending on how true the story sounds, I may go ahead and tell someone else.
Having said that, I hope those of you who know me also know that if something sounds too far fetched to be true or if you're talking about someone close to me, I'll call you out. I won't stand by and let someone I love have their lives dissected over something trivial. Just because Larry has phone calls from Patty doesn't mean there's something shady going on. I'd hate for someone to look Rob's phone and see that he's talked to his friend Gail 4 nights this week. Do I think there's something going on there? No. She's someone he worked with for years and he values her opinion about his new job as well as her stories about the place they used to work together.
So, this week I chose to avoid conversations that spoke of someone else in a bad way. I either tried to change the subject or I simply walked away. Seriously...there was a time in the last week that someone started to talk about something I knew nothing of, had no desire to know anything about, and I refused to hear it...even though my friend's first words were "You ain't gonna believe this!" I politely told my friend I had other things to do and that I'd call her later. I never made that phone call.
I know that I have a LONG way to go on this virtue, but tiny steps are better than no steps at all, right?
This coming up week is ORDER...(insert exasperated sigh here)
